Road Trip

Last weekend me and the boys went down to Buffalo for the quasi-annual trip to see the Toronto Bills in action. It was a weekend full of win. Well, except for the casino part. Uh, and the football game. 

Saturday night was spent at Boston Pizza on the Canadian side of Niagara Falls, where we watched the Toronto Maple Leafs play the greatest third period of all time against the New York Rangers.

Five goals in five minutes and 21 seconds. That, Stephen Valiquette, is what I like to call revenge.

After making our donation at the casino, we proceeded to cross the border at around 1:15 AM. Of course our good friends, U.S. Border Patrol, summoned us inside, you know, so we could all catch up. Small talk: how are the kids, the dog, the job, when was the last time you visited the Middle East. The regular stuff. We're all real tight down at the Rainbow Bridge. The good people over there certainly never miss an opportunity to personally say hello and welcome us to their beautiful country.

We spent the rest of Saturday night in Niagara Falls, New York and, let me tell you, someone on the American side missed the memo that the area can work out to be a pretty bitching tourist destination. I mean, the Canadian side is absolutely bumping. You cross the border and you're walking deserted streets like Will Smith in I Am Legend. 

Instead of taking another beating at the Seneca Niagara Casino, we ended up at the uber-American institution known as Denny's. It was a no-brainer, really.

As for the game, you can see by the picture above that things are a changing at good old Ralph Wilson Stadium. They're still running the trough system in the washroom, but now that the words "Do Not Urinate In Sink" words emblazon the walls, people have stopped, well, urinating in the sink. I guess all it took was the sign to stop the insanity. Who knew?

Good times were had by one and all. The always pleasant tailgating experience left me joyously inebriated, the weather was beautiful, no one pissed in the sink, and I got into a round of verbal jousting with a Jets fan. He gave me the "You know what Bills stands for? Boy I Love Losing Super Bowls!" line, and it was my moral duty to let him have it. Yeah, the Bills lost, but come on, four out of five ain't bad. On top of it all, I got to see some guy everyone keeps going on about - I believe the gentleman's name is Brett Favre - live and in living colour.

One more thing: if we can't tailgate in Toronto like they do down in Buffalo, they deserve the Bills a lot more than we do. I think I enjoy the tailgating experience more than the actual game itself. Something about drinking heavily and eating red meat at 9:30 in the morning just sits well with me, I guess.

Stay classy, Buffalo...

*Thanks to my new friend Dave Sommer for the picture.

Deep Thoughts Vol. 10: Leafs & Rangers Edition

I'm always bitching about the Maple Leafs' perplexing inability to kill penalties, so let me be the first to raise a glass to their efforts when down a man last night. Eight for eight on the penalty kill, my friends. Outstanding.

I guess three days of practice really helped. Who knew, eh Allen Iverson?

The Leafs ended up on the wrong end of the score, losing 1-0 in a shootout, but I'm not going to make like most of the "Negative Nancy's" out there, who will tell you how bad the Leafs were last night and how the tanking of the season is off to a fine start (Lordosis at PPP, I'm looking right at you, big daddy). In the words of my homegirl Wrap Around Curl, "fuck that noise."

Vesa Toskala was sublime last night. What an effort, making 32 saves, a number of them of the difficult variety. When he's on his game he really is one of the top goalies in the league. He did get some help from his goal posts, but all the good goalies do. As a goalie, and a good one I might add, I speak from experience. My posts and I, we're tight. We help each other out. It's a give and take relationship, and I'm sure it's the same between Vesa and his posts. I actually talk to mine. We exchange pleasantries. I'm curious as to whether Vesa does the same.

Here's some deep thoughts:

• I don't know about you, but I'm really starting to hate Stephen Valiquette. Mother fucker is like nine feet tall.
• Jonas Frogren is a shot-blocking machine. I'm loving his passion.
• Poor Marc Staal got his ass kicked by Jamal Mayers. Attaboy Mayers. Pick on someone you know you can deal with. Hollweg, you taking notes, jackass?
• Matt Stajan's out of the dog house. But he still sucks. I know, he responded to his press box banishment and played better. My point is, he still sucks.
• If Ponikarovsky takes another lame hooking penalty I think Ron Wilson is going to bench him. And what's with all the Poni hate all over the place? You people are all crazy.
• Antropov and Grabs have got to start scoring.
• Nikolai Kulemin is a breakaway machine. I wonder how many more times he can go to the well and use the same move.
• I hate shootouts.
• Everyone hates Jason Blake. Except me.
• Toronto was 33-24 on the faceoffs last night. Practice man, we talking about practice.
• Seriously, I hate shootouts.
• Niklas Hagman is quickly becoming one of my new favourite Leafs.

Luke Schenn played a shade under 26 minutes last night, and blocked a number of shots. He was out there on the penalty kill and he was out there in the last minute of play. You name the situation, he can play in it. Fuck it, let's keep him. The future is now, and I'm pretty sure this guy isn't going to be too pleased about it.

The Leafs went into a tough building against the NHL's best team, killed eight penalties, shut out their high-scoring opposition, and came out with a point. I'll take it.

Some will say the Leafs have won only one game out of their first four. Not me. I say we've only lost one out of four in regulation time, against some pretty formidable competition.