Deep Thoughts: 5:00 am

In no particular order ...

1. Chris Chelios loves playing hockey. So much so that the 47-year-old refused to sign with an NHL team in a limited role, and chose to continue riding the bus in the minors. I used to hate Chelios. I don't really, anymore. Life is short. I like to think that if I was professional hockey player, and had a career that mirrored his, I'd be doing exactly what Chelios is doing. I hope he plays forever.

2. I have no plans to travel by air to the USA over the next little while. But I'm already looking forward to that security check. As someone with brown skin born in Kuwait City, it's going to be a hoot.

3. Fuck. Tomas. Plekanec. I traded him in my fantasy keeper league last season. For nothing. And he was one of my four keepers. After posting 69 points in 2007/2008, I figured he was ready to break out in 2008/2009. But he struggled. Put up only 39 points. And I, shockingly, showed remarkably little patience. Today he's seventh in league scoring with 44 points, and it physically hurts to see him sitting in the top-10. To add more misery to my life, a staggering 18 of his points have come on the power play - more points on the PP than Henrik Sedin, Sidney Crosby, Alex Ovechkin, Nicklas Backstrom and Dany Heatley. And you know what? I could have used those valuable power play fantasy points, instead of relying on the the Brian Rolstons, Cory Stillmans and Marco Sturms of the fantasy hockey world.

4. Speaking of my fantasy team, keeper Brad Boyes has one fewer goal than everyone's favourite Toronto Maple Leaf, and soon to be unrestricted free agent, Lee Stempniak. In his career, Boyes has registered seasons of 26, 17, 43 and 33 goals. He's on pace to finish his current campaign with 19. He needs to find his God damn equilibrium. Regardless, I'm in a pickle. Moving forward, do I keep him? As of today, my four best fantasy points performers are Sidney Crosby (1365 points), Tomas Vokoun (1031 points), Jamie Langenbrunner (855 points), and Brooks Laich (745 points). Laich's no keeper; he's been awful after getting off to a great start. I'm leaning towards keeping Matt Duchene; 24 points (630 pool points) as an 18-year-old is nothing to sneeze at. In conclusion: fuck both Boyes and Plekanec.

5. As I grow older, I care less and less about the NFL. And I'm totally at peace with this development.

6. Does Sidney Crosby still live at Mario Lemieux's place? I ask in all seriousness. Because if he does, he's not allowed to be captain of Team Canada. You must live in your own place to captain Team Canada. Enough's enough. Otherwise he'll never leave.

7. I'm sure you already noticed, but the Vernon Wells Hatred Advisory System has been lowered to GUARDED. He does yeoman's work in the community, and for those less privileged, and deserves some props for it. Look within your heart; you can learn to love Wells again. Just let him in. I have.

8. Does anyone know how much the Olympic Torch Relay costs? My attempts to find out (read: I googled it) have so far been unsuccessful. I understand the desire to unite this massive country behind the Vancouver games, but the whole production seems like a giant waste of money. And a giant waste of news time, too. I guess when the Olympics cost that much money, what's a few million more?

9. Have you seen highlights of Pat Quinn recently? He looks like he could use a scotch. A double. Coaching the Edmonton Oilers does not seem to be a lot of fun.

10. Inspired by MF37 at Bitter Leaf Fan Page, the best book I read in 2009 was, without a doubt, A Fine Balance by Rohinton Mistry. The runner-up: Imperial Life in the Emerald City; Inside Iraq's Green Zone by Rajiv Chandrasekaran.

11. The sample size (15 games, 14 starts) is about half that of most starting NHL goalies, but Tuukka Rask's save percentage is a sterling .933. Vesa Toskala can't even dream a save percentage that impressive. It's looking more and more like the team that drafted Rask 21st overall in the 2005 draft - behind guys like Benoit Pouliot (4th overall), Glibert Brule (6th overall), Brian Lee (9th overall), Marek Zagrapan (13th overall), Sasha Pokulok (14th overall), Ryan O'Marra (15th overall), Alex Bourret (16th overall), Ryan Parent (18th overall), Jakuk Kindl (19th overall), and Kenndal McArdle (20th overall) - got a steal. Hey, Pat Quinn, pass the scotch.

12. It's amazing how quickly some of my fellow Leafs fans forget that Jason Blake had the second-best season of his career in 2008/2009. His career.

13. I wonder what the money line is on whether Janet Napolitano will resign ...

14. I enjoy watching Nazem Kadri play, but Canada's first two games at the World Junior Tournament were boring to watch. It's not Team Canada's fault. What are they supposed to do, not score? This one falls on the tournament organizers.

15. The Toronto Raptors have played more games than just about every other team in the NBA, but their 15-17 record has them in playoff position. The 6th seed, to be exact. Seed number three? The Orlando Magic. Vince Carter. Perhaps it's because I'm a glutton for punishment, but I want this to happen.

16. Who's your starter - Jose Calderon or Jarrett Jack? I still have faith in Jose. Although the Jack signing, with Calderon injured again, might be more important, at this point, than the Hedo Turkoglu signing.

17. Cheers, and Happy New Year. Thanks for reading in 2009. You'll never fully understand my gratitude. Here's to 2010 ...

Ball Four

I finally picked up a copy of Jim Bouton's masterpiece, Ball Four; his chronicles as a member of the 1968 Seattle Pilots. In a day and a half, I've whipped through half the book's 465 pages. It's everything I was told it would be.

On this fine Christmas day, allow me to share with you a short passage that struck close to home:

"I am, of course, an optimist. Each year I'm certain I'm going to be great again. Every winter I get a questionnaire from Sport magazine on picking the pennant races and I always pick myself as Comeback of the Year. Each year I believe it. Each winter I pay a college kid $5 three nights a week to catch me in a gym. Each year I'm certain.

"And here I go again. I'm more positive than ever. My arm feels great. I've made the ballclub. I'm starting to throw like I used to throw, and I'm thinking I'll be a reliever for a while and then I'll do well in long relief and get a spot start now and then. Then I'll complete a ballgame and along around June they're going to stick me into the rotation and I'm going to wind up winning a flock of games, just like I did when I first came up to the Yankees. I see the team doing real well and I see me as one of the keys to our success. I see myself as one of the reasons we might finish third or fourth, I see myself as a goddam hero. That's what an optimist is, isn't it? A goddam hero."

Jim Bouton. My kind of guy.

Merry Christmas, and Happy Halladays, to you and yours. Cheers.

More J.P. Ricciardi Goodness

I've just begun to read Rob Bradford's 2004 book, Chasing Steinbrenner: Pursuing the Pennant in Boston and Toronto. Literally. I'm on page ix of the acknowledgements; the first page of the book. (You knew it was only a matter of time before I read a book with "pennant" and "Toronto" in its title.)

Found in the third paragraph of said first page is the following nugget, which put a smile on my face, and which I must share with you:

"Topping that list [of people to thank] is John Paul Ricciardi, the former scout who used to go out of his way in the Fenway Park dining room to talk basketball with a fellow high school basketball coach who carried no weight among a room usually full of baseball power. In the cutthroat world of media, scouts, and other executives, there is no more genuine person in any business than J.P."

Rob Bradford is clearly my new favourite author.

As for Ricciardi, it's amazing that even after he trades a Scott Rolen who asked to be dealt out of town, he can do nothing right in the eyes of so many.

Look, the trade wasn't about Edwin Encarnacion and his underperforming bat (he'll fit right in), and horrendous defence. It was about money, first and foremost, and the arms of Josh Roenicke and, especially, Zach Stewart.

I love Scott Rolen. We all do. The impact he had on Toronto's baseball fans, in only a year and a half wearing the best baseball jersey of them all, was nothing short of profound. #LONGLIVETHEGBOAT.

But Ricciardi did the right thing. He traded, for youth, a Scott Rolen who will be banking $11.625 million as a 35 year old in 2010; who has played more than 115 games in an MLB season once since 2005; and who seriously contemplated retirement late last season. J.P. sold high. And isn't that what a general manager is supposed to do?

For more on Rolen, Ricciardi, and the "utter disgrace" that is Kevin Millar, hit up my man Drew - LTB at Ghostrunner on First. And for more on the new guys, allow yourself to be filled in by the great Jon Hale at The Mockingbird.

Enjoy and appreciate Scott Rolen, Cincinnati. You'll never see it done better at third base.

Moneyball

I finally read it. And: wow.

I don't know what took me so long but, like many things in life, better late than never.

"My shit doesn't work on in the play-offs. My job is getting us to the play-offs. What happens after that is fucking luck."

- Oakland A's General Manager Billy Beane

Buy it. Borrow it from your local library. Steal it. If you're a fan of the beautiful game of baseball, you need to know exactly what Billy Beane's "shit" is.

I'm kind of sad I've finished it. Fuck. What a book.