Ball Four

I finally picked up a copy of Jim Bouton's masterpiece, Ball Four; his chronicles as a member of the 1968 Seattle Pilots. In a day and a half, I've whipped through half the book's 465 pages. It's everything I was told it would be.

On this fine Christmas day, allow me to share with you a short passage that struck close to home:

"I am, of course, an optimist. Each year I'm certain I'm going to be great again. Every winter I get a questionnaire from Sport magazine on picking the pennant races and I always pick myself as Comeback of the Year. Each year I believe it. Each winter I pay a college kid $5 three nights a week to catch me in a gym. Each year I'm certain.

"And here I go again. I'm more positive than ever. My arm feels great. I've made the ballclub. I'm starting to throw like I used to throw, and I'm thinking I'll be a reliever for a while and then I'll do well in long relief and get a spot start now and then. Then I'll complete a ballgame and along around June they're going to stick me into the rotation and I'm going to wind up winning a flock of games, just like I did when I first came up to the Yankees. I see the team doing real well and I see me as one of the keys to our success. I see myself as one of the reasons we might finish third or fourth, I see myself as a goddam hero. That's what an optimist is, isn't it? A goddam hero."

Jim Bouton. My kind of guy.

Merry Christmas, and Happy Halladays, to you and yours. Cheers.

Back in the basement

No, smart ass, I'm not talking about the Toronto Blue Jays. I'm talking about me. I leave the friendly confines of my mom's basement for a quick sojourn out of town, and drama ensues. Farah Fawcett, Michael Jackson, and Billy Mays all leave this world, all too soon. And the Toronto Maple Leafs draft a Muslim kid.

Nazem Kadri is the newest Maple Leaf, immediately the franchise's top prospect, and the offensive future of the hockey club. And I couldn't be happier about it.

No, I'm not going to make like some of my Leafs-supporting brethren out there and bitch about the fact that Brian Burke wasn't able to move up and land John Tavares, or Brayden Schenn. Fuck that. I'd rather celebrate the glory that is, and will one day be in the blue and white, Nazem Kadri.

Filthy, eh? Props to my boy Chemmy for sharing that gem.

What do you think: Nasty Nazem, or Kid Kadri? I'm good with either, really.

I'm titillated about #91's arrival. Probably more so than I was about Luke Schenn. (Blasphemy, I know.) After watching Kadri play back in February, deep down, he's the one I wanted. Mostly because I like saying "Kadri!!1"

"Kadri!!1" is the new "playoffs!!1"

Seriously. Excited. Enough to buy a bottle of champagne in celebration at Peel Pub, in Montreal, on Sunday night.

And how could I not be? Selected seventh overall after putting up 78 points in 56 games last season with the London Knights (and 21 points in 14 playoff games), Kadri is the highest-drafted forward chosen by the Maple Leafs since Scott Thornton, taken third overall, 20 years ago, in 1989. (Let's not talk about how that worked out. Thanks.) Kadri could be the young, dynamic, explosive, home-grown offensive player I've been waiting for all my life.

There's more: Kadri can kill penalties. He led the OHL with 10 shorthanded points last season. It feels like Christmas around here.

And the icing on my Kadri cake: the Ottawa Senators wanted him.

Believe in Nazem Kadri. The future is bright.

And it's about to get even brighter. When the dust settles on July 1st, aptly titled Canada Day to celebrate the NHL's free agent frenzy, my favourite new Maple Leafs will be Kadri, of course, Daniel and Henrik Sedin (I'm sure Mats Sundin put in a good word), and hopefully Manny Malhotra. Seriously; Christmas. In July. I really should get started on that Burke statue.

And, finally, in honour of Burke not trading my heartthrob Tomas Kaberle. Yet, at least ...

Clearly my man Burke realizes the value of an incredible cross-ice pass (like you won't believe) at only $4.25 million a season.

You should, too.

UPDATE: As you know by now, Justin Pogge's been tendered a qualifying contract offer. He remains a Leaf. He also remains a very terrible goalie. One more year, and he'll officially be a bust. Good times.

And here's my new desktop background: