July 27, 2009

"SimmonsSays"




Right off the top: I don't read Steve Simmons' work. In this case, it just happened. And while I hate to do this, Simmons leaves me no choice. This one's for you, CoxBloc ...

"The normal July selloffs in baseball are of players with expiring contracts, which makes the Roy Halladay situation all the more confounding. Why the need to trade him now? Why is it necessary, with another season left on his contract, not knowing what next year will bring, who the new president or general manager will be, or how this Blue Jays team will be comprised? Why not try to build around him for what could be his final season in Toronto rather than make this his final weekend with the Jays?"

A) Doc isn't a lock to be traded.

2) J.P. Ricciardi knows his asset is going to test free agency. He wouldn't be doing his job if he didn't put Halladay on the market, as he's done.

D) We all know the Jays can't afford to let Halladay walk for only two compulsory draft picks. Well, everyone except Mr. Simmons, clearly.

And now, some fun with numbers: if a team, say, I don't know, the Philadelphia Phillies, acquires Doc today, they have him guaranteed, apart from injury, as part of their rotation for eight months. If the Phillies acquire Halladay next July, in 2010, they've got him for two months. You tell me, is eight greater than two? Very good. If the competition wants Halladay for eight months, along with his exclusive negotiating rights, the price goes up. Bottom line: Doc's value will never be higher. Math; it's some crazy shit.

"Clearly J.P. Ricciardi lacks the vision and the creativity to build a winner. That much we know. So we reiterate the question we asked last week: Why, if Ricciardi is certain to be gone, is he the one handling the Halladay trade talks? And why, if he will have nothing to do with the future of the Jays is he involved in the transaction that supposedly will set this team up for the future?"

Amazing. Simmons goes out his way to point out that Doc is under contract through 2010, but fails to mention that same fact about Ricciardi. Nicely done. And let's file the "Ricciardi is certain to be gone" statement alongside "Mats Sundin needs immediate hip surgery, and may be forced to retire." (No, Simmons will never live that one down.)

As for the potential trade, even my mom, upstairs, knows that the Halladay decision is not being made by Ricciardi alone; J.P.'s not hiding in a closet at the Rogers Centre, making the deal on his cell phone. Assistant GMs Alex Anthopoulos and Tony LaCava are heavily involved, as is Paul Beeston, and ownership. To suggest that Ricciardi is making the decision all by his lonesome is, well, Toronto Sun reporting.

"A Ricciardi question: Has there ever been a more unpopular GM in Toronto history? And that's including Gerry McNamara and John Ferguson Jr."

A Simmons question: Has there ever been a more unpopular sports reporter in Toronto history? And that's including Howard Berger and Damien Cox.

"Used to think Scott Rolen was a real pro until he turned down a simple television request for an interview the other day. Hey Scott, this ain't St. Louis, pal. Part of the millions you make is to try to sell the product ..."

The fact that Simmons no longer likes Rolen makes me like the hulking third baseman even more. GBJOAT - Greatest Blue Jay of All Time.

"When Mark Buehrle threw his perfect game this week, he became the 17th White Sox pitcher to throw a no-hitter. That's 16 more than the Jays can boast."

When the Chicago White Sox won the World Series in 2005, it was their first title in 88 years, since 1917. That's one fewer than the Jays can boast. But, yeah, keep working on those no-hitters and perfect games, Jays pitchers. Just one? Pathetic.

Never. Reading. Simmons. Again.

11 comments:

Johnny G said...

"As for the potential trade, even my mom, upstairs, knows that the Halladay decision is not being made by Ricciardi alone;..."

Ohhh.. I see what you did there.

furcifer said...

Rolen=GBJOAT - You write the posts, I'll make the t-shirts.

William said...

Look at the guy's picture. He's obviously a dork.

The Ack said...

"Used to think Scott Rolen was a real pro until he turned down a simple television request for an interview the other day. Hey Scott, this ain't St. Louis, pal. Part of the millions you make is to try to sell the product ..."

What a fucking asshat statement. Well then, glad that changed your opinion of the man entirely, Simmons. He's clearly an asshole and doesn't respect the game, right?

FUCK OFF.

Mattt said...

Great post. I'm new to this blog but so far so good. Gotta disagree on one point-Damien Cox is THE WORST sports journalist. If there is such a thing as 'journalism by numbers', he has the system mastered. Simmons is a
close second though...

Junior said...

Ever watch TSN's rip-off of "The Reporters" on Sunday morning? Yeah, I know, me neither - but once or twice I DID wake up to find the TV blaring and the remote control lost, with Simmons, Cox and some other Bozo hanging out with Dave Hodge. My point is that watching Simmons for even 5 minutes on this show is enough to convince you that he's the kind of guy that had his lunch money taken from him a LOT.

He comes up with things to say, even on that program, and then immediately glances around the table to see if he's gotten anyone's attention with the wonderful thing he's said. It's pathetic; he's like a nervous teenager hanging out in the smoking area at high school for the first time. I half expect to see his leg jiggling up and down and find him doodling "Steve and Damien: DA BOYZ ROOLZ" on his notebook.

To counteract your affliction of Simmons-itis, I recommend bleaching your eyes and completely emptying your brain of his garbage via heroic quantities of alcohol.

twentyfifthhour said...

I don't like J.P., but Simmons is a douche.

60 and 6 said...

I'm a Phillies fan, and I've been checking out some Toronto-based blogs to get an idea of how everyone felt about the Halladay stuff. About the way I would expect, can't blame you. Makes more sense than the fairly sizable contingent of Phils fans who don't want to trade J.A. Happ under any circumstances. I'm with Eyebleaf on thinking it's a good idea for the Jays to move Halladay now, whether he comes to my team or not, though I think Ricciardi is going to have to come off his asking price a little bit to get something done. I just wrote a bit about it on my new site, check it out if you'd like.

And coming from someone who would make no apologies for Scott Rolen under any circumstances, I hope I'm not jumping to conclusions when I say that writer is a jackass.

Johnny G said...

JP better not "settle". I will drove down the 401 to kick him in the knees and punch him in the gut if he does.

Pension Plan Puppets said...

This is a tangent because there's not much to add beyond agreeing that Simmons sucks:

He's clearly an asshole and doesn't respect the game, right?

This really made me laugh because yesterday I was watching the game and Mulliniks (I think, let's go with NotCampbell) was gushing about Lind or Hill because they hustled out a groundball. "He plays the game the right way" was tossed out and having read a lot of FJM that sure came out as "He's white so I like him.

eyebleaf said...

@ Mattt: Glad you found the blog. And you're probably right; it was COXBLOC for a reason.

@ 60: Thx for stopping by. I don't see J.P. backing down from his asking price, and I don't think he should. So I think Doc will remain in Toronto.

@ Johnny: There's no way J.P. settles.

@ PPP: I miss Fire Joe Morgan.

And I didn't read Simmons yesterday. I won.